


Desperate Times Call For Desperate Measures

by ShutUpAndPaddle



Category: CSI: Miami
Genre: F/M, Moderate language
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-08
Updated: 2013-05-08
Packaged: 2017-12-10 19:28:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 16,986
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/789300
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShutUpAndPaddle/pseuds/ShutUpAndPaddle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Horatio has taken desperate measures to protect the one he loves from Ron Saris, but he soon realises that he's overestimated his lover. Is he able to right his wrong before it's too late? <br/>Story 20</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Zoë was driving frantically in her hummer to a new crime scene, she was belting down the motorway at a ridiculous speed with urgency. She pulled up onto the tarmac at the local airport and jumped out of the hummer and glared at Ryan, Eric and Walter who all turned to look at her as she rushed over to them.  
“Where is he?!” Zoë questioned forcefully, as she looked up to the 3 of them from the large puddle of deep red blood. Each of them swallowed, one after the other having seen the fire in her eyes.  
“Where is Natalia?” She questioned.  
“She has taken some leave.” Ryan squeaked. Zoë exhaled and pinched the bridge of her nose as she shook her head.  
“I’m only going to ask this once more. Where is Horatio?” She asked, dangerously low.  
“We’ve moved his body, Zoë.” Ryan said softly, trying to keep the situation calm.  
“What? Why?” She questioned. “This has not happened!” She swallowed as she looked back down at the pool of blood.  
“I’m so sorry Zoë.” Eric said softly, followed by Walter.  
“Come on.” Ryan said, trying to pull her away from the scene.  
“Where is he, Ryan?” She questioned, tears gathering in her eyes, her anger slowly dying and being replaced with hurt and emptiness.  
“He’s been taken by the coroner already, we can’t have his body being plastered all over the news.” Ryan said softly as he placed his hand on her back.  
“No, you can’t do that. We need photographs of the scene! This is compromising the investigation. How will we catch our killer?” She questioned, holding the tears back.  
“I’ve got a few photos. But it’s not a good idea for you to look at them.” Ryan said softly.  
“I need to see.” She said looking up at him as she began to tremble.  
“No, Zoë, I–” Ryan began but was cut off.  
“I need to see!” She snapped and Ryan regretfully handed her his camera. She pulled up the pictures and Ryan saw her face drain of its colour. Her mouth fell open and she threw the camera back at Ryan and turned. She began to run back to her hummer as Ryan called after her. Eric and Walter both watched it all unfold in front of them. Ryan began to walk over to the hummer as they saw her wipe her eyes. As he got closer she revved the engine and reversed quickly and pulled away at speed. Ryan watched her drive away and then looked down at the floor and shook his head. He turned around and made his way back to Eric and Walter and looked up at them.  
“We can’t just let her drive away like that.” Eric said, surprised that Ryan hadn’t gotten into his hummer to chase after her.  
“She needs some space. I won’t do her any good if I chase her.” Ryan said softly as he looked down at the blood pool.  
“You know what she can be like under stress. She could blackout at the wheel.” Eric said, worried.  
“I know, she’ll go home though. She’ll go for a jog and I’ll go round later. Don’t worry about it.” Ryan said softly, remaining calm.  
“You don’t know if that will happen. She can be unpredictable.” Eric said, confused by Ryan’s calmness.  
“Don’t worry, Eric, she’ll be fine. I know what she’s like when she’s stressed and upset, okay?” Ryan said softly and Eric nodded. They all looked back down at the blood pool and swallowed.  
“Who’d do this to H?” Eric questioned.  
“Only half of Miami” Ryan exhaled as he got a sample of the blood.  
“Half of Miami goes after Zoë, is she safe now that H is gone? Won’t people be after her now that he’s gone?” Walter questioned.  
“Yes, she’s okay. She’s more than safe in her house.” Ryan said softly and they nodded at him.  
“Where is his body though, Ryan?” Eric questioned.  
“It’s been taken to a private morgue for examination.” Ryan said as he looked up at Eric.  
“How were you here so fast?” Eric then questioned.  
“I was out running an errand when it was called in.” Ryan said as he stood straight and Eric nodded at him.  
“Are you sure Zoë will be okay?” Eric asked.  
“Yes, I’m going to pop round after we’re done here and then later.” Ryan said softly, both Eric and Walter nodded at him. Ryan then began to question himself, and whether Zoë really was okay. He began to really worry.  
“On second thoughts, is it okay if you guys get this scene done?” Ryan questioned and they nodded at him.  
“Thank you, I’ll call later and I’ll be back.” Ryan said and they nodded at him as he quickly rushed away and drove over to Zoë’s house and pulled up outside, he saw that her car was next to Horatio’s. He got out of his hummer and walked up the drive and knocked on the door and waited for a response. He knocked again but got no response and his heart began to pound. He let himself in.  
“Zoë? Are you in?” He called loudly as he scouted downstairs.  
“Zoë?” He questioned and then quickly went upstairs and checked all bedrooms and bathrooms. He saw the suit she was wearing on her bedroom floor. ‘Ah, she’s probably out for a jog.’ Ryan thought to himself and then quickly left, driving back to the scene to find them packing away and about to head off.  
“How’s Zoë?” Both Eric and Walter called.  
“She’s good, she’s on a jog.” Ryan said softly and they nodded at him and gave the patrol officers a nod as they left.  
“How are we going to get a suspect list? There’s hundreds of people who would want to kill H.” Eric said as they got back to the lab and all walked in.  
“We’ll have to go through the hundreds then.” Ryan replied and they nodded at him with a sigh.  
“I can’t believe this has happened. What was H doing there in the first place?” Eric questioned.  
“Your guess is as good as mine.” Ryan replied as they stepped out of the lift.  
They got on with the case and worked hard, but couldn’t find any leads and with the sheer amount of people who would want Horatio dead, it was making it even harder for them. The list was ever growing the more they searched the threats he’d received and criminals that vowed they’d get him.  
“I never knew H had so many people who hated him.” Walter commented.  
“Well, that’s what you get when you put hundreds of criminals behind bars for the rest of their life, their family members aren’t always pleased either…” Eric said as he read through the list they had compiled.  
They spend the afternoon working hard until the night shift took over and they had to leave. Ryan went straight over to Zoë’s house. He was driving down her road when he saw someone in her front garden. He put the window down and pulled his gun from his holster and approached quietly in the car. He pulled up onto the path and saw the man with something dark in his hand.  
“Miami Dade police! Drop the weapon!” Ryan shouted. Ryan saw that it was a grenade in his hand and immediately pulled his trigger as the man reached for the pin on the grenade, shooting the man in the back. He jumped out of the car then ran up Zoë’s path and hopped over the rockery that divided the garden from the path and drive.  
“Ron Saris, you son of a bitch” Ryan growled, kicking the grenade from his hand and staring down at him. He pulled his phone out and notified the police as he bent down to get a pulse and then notified them that they needed a coroner. He quickly walked away and knocked on Zoë’s door again.  
“Zoë, I need to know that you’re okay?” Ryan called loudly and then glanced round when a patrol car turned up.  
“His name is Ron Saris, I caught him just about to launch a grenade through Detective Chambers window.” He said and they nodded at him.  
“How did you get here so quickly anyway?” Ryan questioned.  
“We got an automated alert about a dangerous weapon at this location.” The officer said as he shrugged. ‘H did mention that there is a smart security system in place, surely it’s not that smart though?’ He questioned himself. More patrol officers turned up with a coroner and CSI’s who began to work. Ryan gave his statement and then entered the house.  
“Zoë?” He questioned. ‘She’s got to be in, she can’t be out still. She wouldn’t have gone far as her car is still here.’ Ryan thought to himself. He began to slowly climb the stairs.


	2. Chapter 2

“Zoë? Are you in?” Ryan questioned and then walked into her bedroom to find everything in the same place. He checked the rest of the rooms and exhaled as he ran a hand through his hair. ‘She hasn’t been back, she couldn’t have. She wouldn’t be able to resist putting her suit in the washing bin; she wouldn’t leave it on the floor. Where the hell has she gone? She can’t still be out on the beach, can she?’ Ryan thought and then took himself downstairs and out of the front door.  
“Get the garden cleaned up, please and put it back how it was.” Ryan said and the detective on duty nodded at him. He walked down the road to the path that led to the beach and down the path and onto the beach. He quickly looked both ways and began to walk up the beach, in hope of finding her sitting on the beach somewhere when his phone bleeped at him.  
“Don’t worry about me. I know there was a bomb scare at mine. Please don’t look for me, I want space, I’m good. Z x” Ryan exhaled and rang her. It went straight through to voicemail and he tried ringing again, but it went straight through to voicemail again. He put his phone back in his pocket and turned around and walked back to his car. ‘I’ll never find her, I just hope she’s okay. She just needs some time.” He thought to himself.   
“Thanks guys, just make sure it’s all in order, she won’t be happy when she comes home to find blood on her window.” Ryan said softly.  
“Of course Wolfe” one of the on duty CSI’s said. Ryan got into his car and drove away. He got home, had a shower and prepared his meal then went to bed.  
Ryan found himself in Horatio’s office as he sat in the comfortable leather chair that sat before his desk as Horatio leant forwards on the desk with his hands clasped together.  
“Mr Wolfe, I need you to keep an eye on Zoë.” Horatio said softly.  
“Of course I will.” Ryan replied as he sat forward on his chair.   
“Are you sure you want to do this, H?” Ryan questioned, looking into his bosses tormented eyes.  
“Yes, desperate times call for desperate measures and I cannot risk Zoë getting hurt again. Ron Saris is after her and I’m not going to let anything happen to her at all. But I need you to keep an eye on her, I need you to be calm with her and I need you to be there for her. She’s more than likely going to experience blackouts due to stress and may go off the rails a little. You need to keep her calm.” Horatio said softly as he looked at Ryan.  
“I will, H. But I’m just concerned that I may not be enough for her, I know she can be temperamental. Are you sure this is the right thing to do? There has to be another way, surely?” Ryan questioned, worried for Zoë’s safety.  
“As long as you’re calm with her and you talk to her in a calm manner, you’ll get through to her. There is no other option, I have to do this, Ron Saris is a piece of work and won’t rest until he gets what he wants, that’s Zoë. I’m not having that at all and I will go to desperate measures to make sure that doesn’t happen. I need to know that I have you on board, there’s no-one else here that I can trust to keep Zoë safe. Eric doesn’t have that strong relationship with her, so it leaves it down to you.” Horatio asked softly.  
“You have my word. But H, what if this doesn’t go to plan, what if I cannot keep her from doing anything rash or something that could potentially threaten her life?” Ryan questioned.   
“In which case, you must call me, if you’re in the situation where she’s threatening her life, you must stall her and if it comes to it, tell her everything. But only if her life is in danger… It shouldn’t come to that though.” Horatio said softly and Ryan nodded as he swallowed.  
“I will keep in regular contact with you, and you need to update me. You need to be first at the scene, I will give you details, I will be gone before the rest of the team get there and I need you to keep Zoë safe from then on. You need to tell them that my body has been taken to a private coroners for examination as you can’t have my death announced and shown all over the TV. It’ll drive Saris out of his hiding place. Do not tell anyone of this, do not tell Zoë unless it is absolutely necessary, is this clear?” Horatio questioned.  
“Crystal clear” Ryan said as he nodded.   
“Okay, thank you Mr Wolfe, that is all.” Horatio said softly and Ryan gave him a nod.   
Ryan was woken by a loud knock at his door. He glanced over to the alarm clock: 5.45am. ‘What the hell?’ He thought to himself and got up and pulled a shirt on and a pair of joggers and sleepily walked downstairs, he heard the knocking get louder. He opened the door and saw Horatio standing there, hands on hips, not happy.  
“Where is Zoë?” He questioned.   
“H, it’s 5.45am, she said not to worry about it.” He grumbled.   
“You took her word for it?” Horatio questioned.  
“Yes, she sounded fine. Come in.” Ryan said, feeling the cool breeze drift through the door and Horatio walked in.  
“Did you speak with her?” Horatio questioned.  
“No, she texted me earlier” Ryan said, squinting at Horatio as he flicked the light on.  
“She texted you, and you believed her? Wolfe, she thinks I’m dead! There is no way she’s okay. But I saw that you got Saris earlier.” He mumbled, grateful.  
“Yes, he was about to put a grenade through your window.” Ryan muttered.   
“Yes, I know I was there, I was about to do something about it but you turned up. Thank you for that.” Horatio said softly.   
“She couldn’t have gone far, her car was still on the drive.” Ryan mumbled as he got a glass of water and took a sip.  
“She has a second car, Wolfe. She’s no-where to be found. I can’t get hold of her.” Horatio tensed. Ryan’s mouth dropped open as he swallowed the water and threw the glass on the side.  
“Wait here.” He said as he ran upstairs and collected his phone. He rang her as he ran back downstairs.  
“It’s ringing.” He said as he heard the dial tone.  
“She’s not answering though.” Ryan said as he dialled her again, only to be put straight through to answerphone.   
“Straight through to answerphone” he said.  
“Well at least she’s still alive in that case! I trusted you Ryan, there’s no telling where she is or what she’s doing!” Horatio ran a hand through his hair.  
“Don’t worry, I’ll track her phone as soon as we get into the lab.” Ryan grumbled. ‘Zoë can take care of herself, she’s a grown woman.’ Ryan thought, thinking Horatio was making a big deal out of it all.  
“Well get dressed, we’re going now.” Horatio muttered and Ryan’s eyebrows rose.   
“I’m being serious.” Horatio added when he saw Ryan’s disbelief. Ryan nodded and walked out and up the stairs and changed before coming down.  
“Come on.” Horatio said forcefully and opened the door as Ryan walked downstairs. Ryan exhaled, feeling exhausted and tired as he put his shoes on and walked out after picking his keys, phone and gun up. He jumped into Horatio’s car and they drove off to work. They quickly got into the lab and immediately began to search for her. Ryan tracked her while Horatio watched with his hands on his hips.  
“She’s north…” Ryan said as the software began to pinpoint her location.   
“I need more, Mr Wolfe.” Horatio grumbled.   
“I’m working on it, H.” Ryan said, feeling the pressure.  
“She’s in New York.” Ryan said as the software began to pin point a more accurate location. Ryan found an address and searched the address to find who owns it.  
“Joseph Green… isn’t he a friend of Zoë’s?” Ryan questioned and Horatio nodded.  
“Come on, we’re going to New York.” Horatio said as he turned around.  
“But H–”  
“Mr Wolfe, we’re going to New York, there is no telling what mental state she is in, she needs to know the truth now Ron Saris is out of the way. You need to come because I can’t just walk into that house, I have no idea what is going through her head, for all I know she’ll pull a gun on me. She’s seen ghosts before, Mr Wolfe, she may not even believe that it’s really me.” Horatio said lowly and Ryan swallowed and nodded at him.  
“We’re taking my car and we need some equipment. Take a laptop from the AV hummer. We’re leaving in 5 minutes.” Horatio said as he walked out. Ryan stood there, shell-shocked with his mouth wide open, not believing any of this was happening.   
“Mr Wolfe!” Horatio raised his voice and Ryan snapped to it. He quickly rushed out and collected a laptop from the AV hummer and met Horatio at his car.  
“Get in, Mr Wolfe.” Horatio said and Ryan did just that. He placed the laptop on the seat with its car charger and plugged his seatbelt in.   
“How did she manage to get to New York without you knowing?” Horatio questioned as he pulled off.  
“I checked her house twice, she said she was okay, I believed her. I made a mistake, okay. I’m really very sorry. But if she’s at this Joe’s house then surely she’s safe?” Ryan questioned, feeling guilty.  
“She may be there, but that doesn’t mean she’s safe.” Horatio said as he put his foot down in the car and went faster than the speed limits.  
“What about work?” Ryan questioned.  
“That’s taken care of.” Horatio said as he concentrated on the road.  
“What are we even going to do when we get there? Walk in and everything be fine and dandy?” Ryan questioned.  
“No, it’ll be far from it. You need to talk to her first before I can make an appearance. Just be gentle with her.” Horatio said as he glanced over at Ryan who nodded at him and swallowed.  
They arrived in New York 16 hours later and both of them were exhausted.  
“This is Joe’s number, you need to call him and tell him that it’s urgent that you speak with Zoë. Don’t tell him I’m alive, you need to tell her, I don’t know just how well he knows what’s gone in with her since she has moved down here so I don’t know if he knows what she can be like. Don’t be rude or forceful towards him though, he’s a very good friend of Zoë’s and probably the only person she feels like she can trust and be close with at the moment. You’ll push her away from you if you’re too strong with him.” Horatio said softly and Ryan nodded.  
“Just how close is she with this guy? I know he’s her ex.” Ryan questioned.  
“Very, they ended on good terms and have been close ever since.” Horatio mumbled softly and Ryan nodded.  
‘Why didn’t she come to me?’ Ryan thought to himself.   
“Don’t take it personally Mr Wolfe, they go back a long time.” Horatio said softly, knowing he was questioning why she didn’t go to him instead.  
“She drove all the way to New York to get away from us all, how am I not supposed to take that personally?” Ryan questioned.  
“Because she’s in that state of mind where she will run instead of face the facts, you know what she can be like. I guarantee you that she thinks that everyone is out to get her, the only person she won’t feel like that about is Joe because he’s not involved with me or anything that has gone on down in Miami.” Horatio said and Ryan nodded. He pulled his phone out and dialled for Joe.  
“Hi, is this Joseph Green?” Ryan questioned.  
“Yes, who am I speaking to?” He asked softly.  
“CSI Ryan Wolfe from Miami, I need to know if Zoë Chambers is with you?” Ryan asked softly and Joe remained silent.  
“Please, don’t tell her I’m calling. I need to know that she’s okay. I’m a good friend of hers.” Ryan pleaded quickly.  
“She’s okay.” Joe said sharply.  
“Thank you, I need to speak with her, urgently. It’s extremely important. But you can’t warn her that I’m coming–”  
“I’m afraid that I can’t let you do that, she doesn’t want to see anyone.” Joe replied.  
“I understand that I really do, but I have to speak with her. I’m in New York now, this is urgent and it can’t wait, I’m only looking out for Zoë and her safety.” Ryan said softly and he heard Joe exhale.  
“Please, just don’t tell her I’m coming, she’ll run and I need to talk with her.” Ryan said softly.  
“Okay, do you have my address?” Joe questioned quietly.  
“I do, I’m sorry I know it’s late but thank you very much.” Ryan said softly.  
“I’m only doing this because she’s spoken highly of you, you need to understand that she can be temperamental at this moment in time.” Joe said quietly.  
“Yes, I know all about that. Thank you again.” Ryan said softly and they then hung up and he looked over to Horatio.  
“I’ll drop you off round the corner, I’ll book two rooms at that hotel, you say you got a taxi, if they ask you say because you didn’t want Zoë to see your car. Once you tell her, ring me and I’ll be right over.” Horatio said and Ryan nodded.  
“I’m absolutely petrified. I’d rather be a part of the bomb squad than this, this has so much more pressure on.” Ryan said as he sorted his jacket out. Horatio couldn’t help but chuckle a little.   
“Okay Mr Wolfe, just remember calm and gentle.” Horatio said softly and Ryan nodded and then got out of the car as Horatio drove off. He walked up to the house.  
‘Well, he’s doing well for himself.’ Ryan thought to himself as he climbed the steps and then knocked on the door. The door opened and a tall man opened it.  
“Hi, Joseph Green?” Ryan questioned.  
“Yes, you must be Ryan Wolfe? And call me Joe, please.” He asked and Ryan nodded. They shook hands.  
“She’s upstairs, I’ll go and get her, if you want to wait here.” Joe said as he walked over to the large flight of stairs as Ryan glanced around the hall, seeing paintings and the patterned ceiling.   
“Zoë?” Ryan heard Joe call and then footsteps pacing down the other end of the hall.   
“Zoë?” Joe called again and then jogged downstairs.  
“She’s not up there.” Joe said, concerned as he quickly made his way down the stairs.  
“Are you sure?” Ryan questioned.  
“I’m positive, she was just up there, I checked not 5 minutes ago. I knew I shouldn’t have allowed this.” Joe said as he ran a hand through his hair. He rushed through to the dining room and peered out one of the windows, he saw the gate open.  
“She’s gone.” Joe murmured, clearly not happy.  
“She didn’t know I was coming though.” Ryan said, beginning to panic himself. ‘It’s late and this is New York, she’s not safe.’ Ryan thought as he ran a hand through his hair.  
“She must has seen you pull up or walk up to the house or something, she’s been a mess all day.” Joe said as he walked back through to the hall with Ryan following and picked up his coat and shoes.  
“We’re going to find her now.” Joe said as he opened the door and Ryan followed as Joe picked his phone out of his pocket and dialled for Zoë.  
“Zoë, when you get this, please ring me back.” Joe left her a voicemail.  
“How has she been?” Ryan questioned.  
“She’s been up and down, she seems to have these blank points, she calls them blackouts?” Joe questioned.  
“Yes, she has blackouts when she’s highly stressed and emotional.” Ryan said as he got into Joe’s car and then texted Horatio to update him.   
“She can’t have gotten far, her car is still here and her keys in her handbag.” Joe said softly.  
“Wait, her handbag is still inside?” Ryan questioned before Joe pulled off.  
“Yes, why?” Joe questioned.  
“Her inhaler will be in there and she may need it, it’s cold and she’s probably running.” Ryan said and Joe nodded at him.  
“I’ll be right back.” He said as he unplugged his seat belt and then got out.   
He ran back with her handbag and threw it onto Ryan’s lap. He pulled away after putting his seatbelt back on and drove whilst he rang Zoë from the car’s Bluetooth.   
“Yes, Joe?” She answered.   
“Zoë darling, I need to know where you are.” Joe said very softly and then put his finger to his lips and glanced round at Ryan before he was about to say something.  
“I need space, Joe. I can’t see Ryan at the moment, he reminds me too much of Horatio. It hurts. Why did you go behind my back? I trusted you.” Zoë mumbled softly.  
“I’m sorry darling, but he really needs to talk to you about something important.” Joe said softly and they heard her exhale.  
“Think about it darling, it must be important if he drove all the way up to New York from Miami.” Joe said softly.   
“Who’s that in the car with you? It better not be Ryan.” She said quietly and Joe swallowed.  
“We’re both very worried about you, Zoë. Where are you?” Joe asked as he glanced around, Ryan doing the same.  
“You better not have me on loud speaker in the car… I will flip if he’s heard any of that.” Zoë said lowly and Joe immediately picked up his phone and put it to his ear.  
“No, no you’re not.” He said frantically.  
“You better not be lying to me, Joe.” She warned.  
“I’m not.” He said as he glanced over to Ryan.   
“We’ll be out all night looking for you if you don’t tell me where you are, darling.” Joe said softly.  
“Don’t worry about me, I can look after myself. I need space.” She said and then hung up. Joe exhaled as he put the phone back.   
“Where are you staying? I’ll drop you off, I sincerely doubt you want to be up all night if needs be to look for her after coming up from Miami.” Joe said softly.  
“I’m staying until we find her.” Ryan assured him and Joe nodded at him as they drove.   
An hour later Ryan pulled out his phone and rang Horatio.  
“Hi, could you please track Zoë’s phone? We’re having a hard time locating her.”   
“I’m doing it now.” Horatio replied.   
“Who’s that?” Joe questioned.  
“The lab” Ryan replied softly and Joe nodded at him.   
“She’s at a bar, 10 minutes from Joe’s house, a bar called the White Horse Tavern.” Horatio said.  
“Okay, thank you.” Ryan replied.  
“She’s probably drinking, in which case, get her gun away from her and get her somewhere safe. It’s not a good idea if I see her tonight if she is drinking, get her back to Joes and keep an eye on her. She has a habit of sleep walking when she’s under stress or had something to drink, and blacking out while sleepwalking.” Horatio said.  
“Certainly, thank you.” Ryan said softly and then hung up.  
“She’s at the White Horse Tavern” Ryan said to Joe and he nodded and sped up. They pulled up outside the bar.  
“She could be drinking, and because she doesn’t drink, or doesn’t drink much she’s likely to be very intoxicated. I need to keep an eye on her tonight, she has a habit of sleepwalking when stressed and if she’s had something to drink and it can sometimes put her life in danger.” Ryan said softly and Joe looked round to him.  
“If you think you’re taking her back to a hotel, you’ve got another thing coming, she’s coming back to mine, she’s in no state to see you right now, let alone be left alone with you.” Joe argued.  
“I know, I wasn’t saying that. Either I stay in my car outside yours or something because she has unknowingly put her life in danger when she’s been sleep walking before, I am not going to come this way to see her walk out into traffic or something.” Ryan argued back.   
“Okay, you can stay at mine but you need to give her the space she needs.” Joe requested and Ryan nodded. They got out and walked into the bar and saw Zoë sat at the bar with an almost empty drink in her hand, looking at her phone.   
“Wait here.” Joe said and Ryan stood by the door. Joe approached Zoë just as she downed the last of her drink and pushed the glass away.


	3. Chapter 3

“Zoë darling” Joe called softly and she glanced round at him as he placed his hand on her back. She looked at him and then turned back around and looked down at the bar.   
“Come on, we’re going back to mine.” He said softly and she shook her head.  
“Zoë, I can’t leave you here, you know I can’t, we need to get you some water and get you home.” He said softly and she turned to him and put her phone away in her bra. As she put her phone away, Joe caught a glimpse at what she was looking at – Horatio and herself in photos.  
“I’m drunk.” She slurred as a tear fell from her eye.  
“I know darling, come on. It’s okay.” He said softly and she looked over at Ryan who was stood at the door and she broke down in tears. She got up off the stool and stumbled over to him and wrapped her arms around his neck as she sobbed into his collar. Joe placed his hand on her back as Ryan held her there.   
“Come on, we need to get you out of here.” Joe said softly and Ryan tried to push Zoë away but she refused to let go.   
“Come on, Zoë. I’m coming back with you.” Ryan said softly and she pulled away from him and stumbled back but they both caught her. She nodded at him and both took her arms and helped her out.   
“Get her in the front.” Joe said as he opened the door and they helped her into the front. Ryan stood back as Joe pulled the seatbelt over her. He closed the door as she put her head back. Ryan climbed in to the back as Joe got into the front. Just as they pulled off Zoë burst into tears again.   
“Hey, hey darling it’s okay.” Joe said as he took his hand off the wheel and placed it on her thigh. She shook her head and began to cough.   
“Ryan, she needs her inhaler.” Joe said softly as he rubbed her thigh.  
“No!” She cried as she shook her head.  
“Darling take it for me please, you know you need it.” Joe said softly as he rubbed her thigh and she looked over at him. Ryan held the inhaler in front of her and she took it off him. She looked up at Joe and he glanced over to her.  
“Take it for me, please, Zoë.” He asked softly and she did as he had asked.  
“Thank you” Joe said softly as he took his hand off her leg and placed it back on the wheel. She looked out of the window as she put her head back and held her tears back as she watched rain begin to fall. They arrived at Joe’s house and both Ryan and Joe got out but Zoë couldn’t even get the seatbelt off, let alone open the door.  
Both Joe and Ryan walked over to her side and opened the door. Joe leant over and un-plugged her seatbelt. Then took her hands and helped her out. She fell against him and he held her up as he kicked the door closed.   
“I should call Horatio and tell him I’m here.” She slurred heavily.  
“Zoë darling, Horatio’s gone.” Joe said softly and she shook her head as he got her up the steps and onto the front porch. He opened the door and they got in.   
“Do you think you can stand?” Joe questioned and she nodded.   
“Okay” he said as he let go of her and took his coat off as she swayed on her feet.   
“I’ll take your jacket.” Joe said then took Ryan’s jacket just as Zoë fell back.   
“Woah, Zoë.” Ryan said as he knelt down and checked her over quickly with his eyes.  
“Come on.” Ryan said as he took her hands and pulled her up so she sat up as she began to laugh. He placed his hands under her arms and lifted her too her feet and she fell against him.  
“We’ll go through to the kitchen to get you some water.” Joe said as he took hold of Zoë and placed her arm around his neck and supported her as he walked through to the kitchen with Ryan following.  
“Here you go darling.” Joe said softly as he placed a glass of water in front of her as she sat at the island counter with Ryan supporting her.   
“So where did you meet Zoë?” Ryan questioned softly.  
“Prep school, then the same grammar school and we then went to the same university together.” He said softly and Ryan nodded.  
“You’re her ex?” Ryan asked softly and Joe nodded.  
“We ended on good terms.” He added softly and Ryan nodded at him.   
“Try and drink it all for me please Zoë.” Joe said and she downed the entire glass.  
“Thank you, let’s get you into bed now.” Joe said softly. He delicately got Zoë up and Ryan followed them.   
“She’s not staying with you, is she?” Ryan questioned.  
“No, she’ll have one of the spares.” Joe said softly as he tried to get her to go up the stairs.  
“Lift your feet, Zoë.” Joe said softly and she did just that but fell as she walked up the stairs.  
“Can you get round her other side?” Joe questioned and Ryan did so and put her arm around his neck and they got her up the stairs and into one of the spares.  
“Could you please wait outside, I need to get her changed.” Joe said softly.  
“Erm, I’m not leaving you alone with her to undress her…” Ryan said, lowering his eyebrows.  
“She won’t want you in here, I’m only getting her changed. Look if it makes you feel better you can stay but turn around.” Joe said, looking at him, disgusted. Ryan swallowed, knowing he’d struck a chord. He turned around as Joe sat her on the bed.   
“I’m just going to get your shorts and top, okay?” Joe asked and Zoë moaned. Joe quickly pulled a pair of shorts and a top from the bag that sat on the chest of draws. Joe quickly changed her and got her into bed.  
“Try and sleep Zoë, I’m just downstairs, okay?” He asked and she nodded up at him.  
“Thank you, Joe.” She slurred heavily and then pulled him down to give him a tight hug. He quickly ran his hand through her hair as she closed her eyes. He backed off and then turned to Ryan.  
“I’m not some sicko that you guys deal with every day.” Joe whispered firmly as he walked out.  
“I’m sorry, but I don’t know you and she is out of it.” Ryan said as he followed him out. He heard Joe exhale and saw him nod.   
“So what is so important that you’ve had to drive up to New York?” Joe questioned as they went downstairs.  
“I’m sorry, I can’t discuss that with you.” Ryan said softly and Joe nodded at him.   
“Do you want a drink?” Joe questioned as he pulled out a cup from the cupboard.  
“A coffee if you’re making, thank you.” Ryan said softly and Joe nodded.   
“She thinks the world of you, you know.” Joe mumbled as he poured the kettle.   
“I’d like to think that was true, but it’s Horatio who she thinks the world of.” Ryan commented back as Joe handed him a coffee.  
“She does, it’s rare for her to be so close with someone.” Joe said softly.   
“Well from what I’ve heard, you mean a lot to her too.” Ryan muttered and Joe nodded.  
“So what happened to cause these blackouts? She never told me about them.” Joe asked softly.  
“Did she tell you she was poisoned and that the toxin that lead to a coma?” Ryan questioned.  
“Yes, is that what brought on the blackouts?” Joe questioned and Ryan nodded.  
“The toxin did something and she can’t cope well under extreme stress anymore, she blacks out when it gets too much for her. It also did something to her heart, no doubt she’s told you that she’s got a pacemaker?” Ryan questioned.  
“No, she’s told me no such thing. Why has she got that?” Joe questioned, alarmed.  
“If she’s not told you then I don’t want to bring it up.” Ryan dismissed.  
“No, tell me she won’t mind, she just has trouble when beginning to tell me when something has gone wrong, she would have told me at some point though. She said she had an operation a little while back, was that for the pacemaker?” Joe questioned and Ryan nodded.  
“She’d go into VF and arrest, one day it got too much and she arrested a few times and they had to fit a pacemaker.” Ryan said softly and Joe nodded.  
“She can’t handle her emotions quite so well either, that again is due to the toxin.” Ryan added.  
“I’ve certainly gathered that. She’s been everywhere, I’ve never seen her so emotional before or to express such emotions so extremely. She wasn’t even like this when Mike died.” Ryan nodded and understood.   
“Yeah, well a lot has happened to her since then.” Ryan mumbled as he sipped his coffee.  
“Tell me about it. I can’t quite believe she’s still standing after going through it all. That Horatio must’ve been a special guy to keep her on the right tracks.” Joe mumbled and Ryan nodded.  
“Anyway, you’re welcome to the other spare, help yourself to food or drink.” Joe said softly.  
“Thank you.” Ryan said softly and Joe nodded at him. They turned to walk over to the stairs when they saw Zoë walking out into the landing to the top of the stairs. Joe quickly ran up to stop her from walking down the stairs.  
“What are you doing up, darling?” He questioned softly.  
“Horatio, he needs to come to bed. I can’t sleep.” She mumbled as Joe took a hold of her as he placed his mug down on the windowsill as Ryan rushed up the stairs.  
“Come on.” Joe said softly.  
“No! The bed is empty, I need Horatio.” She whined.   
“Zoë darling, I’m sorry but that isn’t possible. Come on.” Joe urged her.  
“No! I can’t sleep, it’s empty.” She slurred more forcefully.  
“Okay darling. How about you share a bed with one of us?” Joe questioned softly.   
“No, I need Horatio!” She cried as tears fell from her eyes.  
“That isn’t possible darling, you can stay with one of us if you want, I don’t mind, I’m sure Ryan doesn’t either.” Joe said softly. She looked round to him.  
“But you’re not Horatio.” She cried as she moved closer to him.   
“I know I’m not darling, but I don’t know what else to suggest.” He said softly as he rubbed her back.   
“Would you rather stay with Ryan?” He asked and she shook her head frantically. She’d unintentionally insulted Ryan, but he was quiet glad that she didn’t want to stay with him as Horatio would have had his head.   
“Do you want to stay with me then?” He asked softly.  
“I want Horatio.” She sobbed again and Joe exhaled.   
“Come on darling, share my bed.” He said softly and she looked up at him and slowly nodded. ‘She’d rather share a bed with him than me?’ Ryan thought to himself. They both pulled from the hug and began to walk into his bedroom.   
“Wait” Ryan said a little alarmed, he knew Horatio wouldn’t like it.   
“Go in darling, I’ll be right through.” He said to Zoë and she nodded and then wiped her eyes. Joe looked to Ryan.   
“I’m sorry, but I’m not entirely comfortable with this.” Ryan said quietly. “How do I know you’re not going to try anything with her?” Ryan questioned.   
“How you could even suggest such a thing is beyond me. Her fiancé has just been killed, to even think of doing something like that is absolutely disgusting. I would never try anything on with her, even if she were sober. She’s family to me, you can see the state she’s in, there is no way she will sleep if she doesn’t share a bed. I gave her the option of sharing with you but it’s clear that she’s more comfortable with me.” Joe said firmly, clearly unhappy with what Ryan had just suggested. Ryan swallowed and stepped back.   
“It’s cream Egyptian cotton!” Zoë cried as she walked back out of the room. Joe turned to her and she fell into his arms.   
“Horatio had a cream Egyptian cotton duvet.” She cried as he began to run a hand through her hair.   
“You have the same washing detergent that he had too.” She cried as she took hold of his t-shirt. Joe sighed, he didn’t know what else to do. ‘I could try and get Kaitlin round, couldn’t I? If not, I’ll have to share the spare with her.’ He thought to himself.  
“I’m sorry, how about Kaitlin? Kaitlin can come and stay with you?” Joe suggested and she looked up at him.   
“Kaitlin, where is she?” Zoë asked slowly as Joe dried her tears.  
“I’ll get her round, don’t worry.” Joe said softly and Zoë nodded at him.   
“Ryan, get her into the bed, I’ll ring Kaitlin.” Joe said softly and Ryan put his mug down and took hold of Zoë.   
“No” she said as she pulled out of Ryan’s grip and took hold of Joe. Ryan looked at her a little confused. Joe saw that she didn’t want to go with Ryan. Joe looked up at him a little confused himself, he raised an eyebrow at Ryan.   
“Come on then darling.” Joe said softly and she walked with him into the spare. Joe got her into bed.  
“I’m just in the hall okay? I’m going to ring Kaitlin.” He assured her and she nodded as she wiped a few tears.   
Ryan entered the room but kept his distance as he also sensed that she didn’t want him near her, he couldn’t understand why though.   
“Kaitlin is on her way over okay? Just try and relax.” Joe said as he walked in.   
“Who’s Kaitlin?” Ryan questioned quietly.  
“Another good friend of Zoë’s. Isn’t she?” Joe asked and she nodded at him. They tried to keep Zoë’s attention on other things until they heard a knock at the door.  
“Stay here” Joe said softly as he got up and walked out. Ryan listened in on their conversation.  
“I’m so sorry for calling at this time of night, Kaitlin, but she’s really not in a good place.” Joe said softly.  
“Not a problem, how’s she been?” A soft female voice asked.  
“Not too good.” Joe said as they began to climb the stairs.  
“Worse than Mike?” She questioned.  
“Much, I’ve never seen her like this.” Joe replied and Zoë got herself out of bed as she heard them walking down the hall on the wooden floor.  
“Hey gorgeous” a petite blonde woman said as Zoë threw her arms around her.   
“Hey, hey, it’s okay.” She said softly as she began to rub Zoë’s back.  
“He’s gone, Kate, he’s gone.” Zoë sobbed and Kaitlin wrapped her arms tighter around Zoë.  
“Come on gorgeous you need some sleep. I’m staying with you.” She said softly and Zoë pulled away and nodded at her. She wiped Zoë’s tears away. Kaitlin looked over Zoë’s shoulder at Ryan.   
“Hi, you must be Ryan?” She asked and Ryan nodded at her.  
“Kaitlin?” Ryan questioned.  
“Yeah” she said softly.  
“I’ll see you tomorrow, we should get some sleep.” Kaitlin said softly as she rubbed Zoë’s back and Ryan nodded.  
“If you need me, I’m just down the hall, okay?” Ryan asked and Zoë nodded at him. Ryan gave her a smile and nod and then quickly wiped a tear from her cheek.   
“Thanks Joe” Kaitlin said softly and he nodded and then closed the door after Ryan walked out. Kaitlin got Zoë into bed and then climbed in with her after changing.  
“Everything’s going to be okay gorgeous.” She said as she looked over to Zoë who looked at her.  
“I miss him.” Zoë cried as she burst into tears again.   
“I know you do, things are going to get better though.” Kaitlin said as she moved closer to Zoë and ran a hand through Zoë’s hair. Zoë rolled over and sobbed as Kaitlin tried her best to calm her.  
“H, Zoë really isn’t in a good place, she’s plastered and couldn’t sleep. Joe has just had to get Kaitlin round as she wouldn’t sleep. This whole thing was a bad idea, it’s honestly torn her a part, she’s going to hate me because I agreed to it all, she’s a mess, I never thought that she’d react so extremely to this. I’ll text you tomorrow to let you know when I’m about to tell her, I don’t think this is going to go as smoothly as either of us hoped. I’m going to tell her first thing in the morning, she needs to know asap.” Ryan texted Horatio as he laid in the unfamiliar bed, listening to Zoë’s quiet sobbing and Kaitlin’s gentle voice as she spoke to Zoë.   
“I never expected it to go smoothly, but she’ll understand that it needed to be done. It was the only thing I could do to make sure she wasn’t hurt by Saris, I had no choice. I knew she wasn’t going to react well to it, which is why I had you involved.” Horatio texted back. Zoë eventually fell asleep as Kaitlin soothed her and fell asleep herself, feeling incredibly bad for Zoë.   
They were all woken that night at 4.35am when they heard a loud slam of the bedroom door where Zoë and Kaitlin were sleeping. Kaitlin jumped out of bed and ran after Zoë as she walked down the hall, her feet lightly patting across the wooden floor.   
“Zoë, come back to bed.” Kaitlin asked softly but Zoë didn’t respond to her, instead she carried on walking over to the double doors at the end of the hall.   
“Zoë?” Kaitlin called loudly and tried to stop her but Zoë was too strong for her.   
“Joe?!” Kaitlin called and then both Ryan’s and Joe’s doors swung open after they threw on some trousers and a shirt. They both rushed over to her.  
“It’s okay, she’s just sleepwalking.” Ryan said as he stood in front of Zoë and lifted her head. He placed his hands on her waist and turned her around. He spoke to her softly as she walked with him and he got her back into the room and into bed.   
“She’s okay.” Ryan assured them both and they gave him a nod. Both he and Joe walked out after Kaitlin walked around the bed and got back in. Joe gave Ryan a nod and they disappeared into their rooms. They were all whisked away into sweet slumber quickly.   
They were woken at 5.55am by a slam of a door downstairs. Both Ryan and Joe ran into the room and found Kaitlin still asleep and both quickly ran back and downstairs and saw the front door wide open. They could see Zoë walking into the road and both of them sprinted out and down the steps and into the road without even looking. Both grabbed each arm and Ryan immediately lifted her into his arms and carried her in quickly as it was pouring down with rain. They got into the hall and Joe closed the door.   
“She can’t be sleepwalking, she would have woken up by now.” Joe said as they walked up the stairs.  
“Well, Horatio had a thought that it was something like sleepwalking combined with a blackout.” Ryan said and Joe nodded at him. Ryan placed her back in the bed with Kaitlin and both walked out.   
“You’re welcome to take a shower if you want.” Joe said softly as he walked back to his room.  
“Thank you.” Ryan said softly and walked back to the room he was staying in. ‘I can see why she’d get on with him well, he really does care about her.’ Joe thought to himself as he thought about Ryan, whilst Ryan was thinking the same thing about Joe.   
Ryan showered and went downstairs and saw Joe in a t-shirt and jeans putting the kettle on.   
“Coffee?” He questioned.  
“Please.” Ryan said softly, then Kaitlin appeared.  
“Hey, one for me too, please Joe.” Kaitlin said with a soft, natural smile.  
“Sorry I didn’t get to meet you properly last night, I’m Kaitlin, I’ve known Zoë since Grammar school.” She said as she held out her hand.  
“Ryan Wolfe, CSI, I work with Zoë.” He said as he shook her hand, admiring her bright blue eyes and long blonde hair.   
“I’ve heard a lot about you.” She smiled.   
“All good, I hope?” Ryan asked softly.  
“Not a bad word in sight. She thinks highly of you, you know?” Kaitlin asked softly as she took a mug from Joe.  
“I’ve been told.” Ryan said softly and nodded.  
“Is she still sleeping?” Joe asked and Kaitlin nodded.   
“I’m sorry for calling you late last night, I hope James wasn’t too pissed.” Joe said softly.  
“Not at all, he understands.” Kaitlin said softly.  
“May I ask why you’re here?” She asked Ryan.  
“I need to speak with Zoë, but I haven’t gotten the chance yet.” Ryan said softly.  
“What about?” She questioned.  
“Sorry, I can’t discuss it with anyone but her.” Ryan said softly and Kaitlin nodded.  
“Police stuff?” She questioned and Ryan nodded.   
“How did she get drunk? She’s not touched alcohol in years, well, on that scale any way.” Kaitlin asked, turning to Joe.  
“She got out without me knowing when Ryan had turned up and we tracked her down to the White Horse Tavern.” Joe said and Kaitlin nodded. She glanced down at her watch and then downed her coffee.  
“Thank you Joe, I’ll be round later. Sorry I have to shoot off to work and I need a shower and change.” She said as she put the mug on the side and then gave Joe a quick kiss on the cheek and shook Ryan’s hand and promptly left.   
“I’m just going to check on her, okay? Feel free to go through to the living room.” Joe said softly and Ryan made his way into the living room while Joe rushed upstairs. He then appeared in the living room with his mug.  
“She looks like she’s sleeping peacefully.” Joe said softly and Ryan nodded.  
“If you need to get off to work then I’m happy to keep her occupied.” Ryan said softly.  
“No it’s okay, I don’t need to go in, I don’t have any meetings scheduled today.” Joe said softly.   
“What area of work are you in?” Ryan questioned.  
“Oil” Joe replied and Ryan nodded.  
“What did you study at University?” Ryan questioned.  
“Physics and Maths” he replied sharply and Ryan nodded, impressed.  
“What level?” Ryan questioned.  
“Ph.D.” Joe replied and Ryan nodded again, impressed.   
“Whatever you need to talk to her about, make sure you’re gentle with her.” Joe said softly.  
“I will” Ryan replied as he sipped his coffee.  
“It’s not anything bad, is it? Because she can’t handle anything bad at the moment.” Joe asked.   
“No, it’s not. But, with her mental state at the moment, I’m unsure how she’s going to take it or how she’s going to react.” Ryan said honestly.   
“Are you sure you can’t run it by me? I don’t want to see her getting hurt.” Joe asked.  
“I really can’t. I don’t want to hurt her and certainly don’t want to see her get hurt as much as you don’t.” Ryan said and Joe nodded at him as he finished his coffee.   
“Whatever it is, just please be gentle with her, I don’t know if you know but she’s mentally younger than she is, she’s been through a lot in her life and she’s still catching up mentally with her age. I’m not saying she’s like a 14 year old… but she can act impulsively, she probably has more of a personality that you’d see in a 22-23 year old, rather than a 28 year old, but she can be extremely mature for her age when it comes to things like work.” Joe said softly and Ryan nodded.  
“I think we’ve all seen how impulsive she can be.” Ryan said softly.  
“It’s not her fault, she had to grow up so fast as a child so she missed out on everything a normal child would go through. Once she moved in with her aunt and uncle, she began to live a proper child’s life again but it still has its effects on her.” Joe said softly, wanting to reiterate that he was to be gentle with her.  
“I understand, I will be gentle with her.” Ryan said and Joe nodded, a little more satisfied.  
“Just how bad was her childhood? I mean, I vaguely know that it wasn’t pleasant.” Ryan said, wanting to know more about Zoë, she talked so often, but rarely about her past.   
“I’m not going to discuss that with you.” Joe said sharply as he looked at Ryan.  
“Fair enough, I understand.” Ryan said as he nodded, seeing Joe close himself off. They continued to talk until 8.30am came around when Ryan’s phone began to ring.  
“Where are you?” Horatio questioned.  
“At Joe’s, why?” Ryan replied.  
“Where is Zoë?” Horatio questioned.   
“She’s here, she’s sleeping.” Ryan said softly, confused as he got up and rushed up stairs with Joe following as he heard Horatio exhale heavily on the phone. They walked in and saw the bed empty and Zoë’s bag gone.   
“She’s not here.” Ryan swallowed as they looked to the open window.


	4. Chapter 4

No, she’s not! I’ve just checked the bank and she’s just brought a car, Mr Wolfe.” Horatio said, extremely agitated.   
“I’m so sorry, where?” Ryan questioned.   
“The local car dealer, I’m coming to pick you up now.” Horatio said as Ryan heard the slam of the car door. They hung up and Ryan turned to Joe.  
“She’s just brought a car, I’ve got to go, I’ve got to find her.” Ryan said as he ran a hand through his hair.  
“Well I’m driving, your car isn’t even here!” Joe said and Ryan ran a hand through his hair.  
“I’m being picked up.” Ryan said softly.  
“By who?” Joe questioned.  
“A friend” Ryan said softly.   
“Something is going on and I don’t like the sound of this, Zoë’s caught right in the middle of it and so help me if you hurt her, I will kill you.” Joe threatened.   
“I’m not going to hurt her! This is police business.” Ryan argued back. “I could never hurt her.” He added as he ran a hand through his hair and then turned around to walk downstairs.  
“Who’s picking you up?” Joe pressed.  
“A friend, okay?” Ryan said as he went downstairs.  
“You are not leaving until I know everything. Zoë is in the middle of this and that makes me in the middle of it too. Now tell me everything. I don’t care if it’s classified.” Joe growled at Ryan, growing agitated as he was thinking that Ryan was involved in a plan to hurt Zoë.  
“I cannot tell you, I’m sorry.” Ryan snapped back.  
“I’m not going to hurt her alright!” He added, looking up at Joe.   
“There is something very suspicious about all of this.” Joe growled back at him.  
“I came here to talk to her about something important and I’ve not had the chance to! I need to go and find her before she does something stupid, now you’re going to move out of my way, please.” Ryan forcefully said.  
“Not until you tell me what’s going on. She is family to me.” Joe defended when Ryan’s phone rang.   
“One moment, H!” Ryan snapped before he hung up.   
“H? Horatio?” Joe questioned, stepping closer to Ryan as Ryan stepped back.  
“He’s alive?!” Joe questioned.  
“That’s why I’ve come here, I need to go and find her!” Ryan snapped at him.  
“You knew all this time!?” Joe raised his voice.  
“Yes, but I couldn’t tell her over the phone or whilst she was drunk, could I!?” Ryan raised his voice back.  
“This is police business.” Ryan raised his voice.  
“Do you realise what this has done to her?! She’s been a complete mess! I had to take her gun off her!” Joe raised his voice.   
“I know! That’s why I got here as soon as I did, Horatio had to do it as there was a dangerous criminal after Zoë! If he hadn’t have done it, Zoë could very well be dead right now! Is that what you want? He did this to protect her! He knew that it would destroy her so that’s why I’ve been following her every step! What would you do if you were in his situation? Would you fake your own death to get the criminal or would you risk her life? Because I’m certain I’d fake my own death to keep her safe!” Ryan snapped at him and Joe backed off and shook his head as he took a deep breath.  
“She nearly killed herself for Christ’s sake, Ryan! That is not looking out for her!” Joe snapped.  
“I know, but it was the right thing to do. None of us could sit back and watch another criminal take their shot at killing her! We did what needed to be done and that criminal is now dead! Horatio knows everything about her and he knows what she can handle and who can handle her which is why I was sent to break it to her first. When we realised that she was at yours we relaxed a little because Horatio knew you meant something to her and could stop her from doing something stupid, but right now, every second is slipping away because you’re refusing to let me do my job and she’s that every bit closer to killing herself again.” Ryan snapped. Joe ran his hand through his hair and they heard a knock at the door.   
Joe forcefully opened it and saw Horatio standing there with his hands on his hips.  
“Horatio Caine, Mr Wolfe, get in the car now. She’s heading out of New York, I’m not wasting any more time.” Horatio said as he turned around and walked back and Joe stood there, gob-smacked.  
“Joe, I need you to stay here in case she comes back.” Horatio called loudly as he headed over to his car. Ryan walked out.  
“Thank you for everything, I really do appreciate it. But right now I’ve got to go.” Ryan said and Joe nodded at him.  
“Keep me updated.” Joe said, in slight shock.  
“Phone me if she comes back.” Ryan said and Joe nodded at him, Ryan ran over to the car and jumped in. They pulled off almost immediately.   
“I’m sorry H, we both thought she was sleeping. We can’t just watch her sleep, you know that.” Ryan pleaded.  
“I know, but surely you heard something?” Horatio questioned.  
“No, nothing.” Ryan replied.  
“She was a complete mess last night. You should have seen her and heard her. Joe had to get someone called Kaitlin round just to get her to sleep.”   
“I never said it was going to be easy.” Horatio reminded.  
“Yes, but Joe just admitted that he had to take her gun from her as she tried to kill herself…” Ryan glared at him.   
“I knew Joe could handle something like that.” Horatio glared back at him.  
“You knew she’d try to kill herself?” Ryan gasped.  
“Well, I didn’t know, I suspected.” Horatio replied, softening his tone with Ryan as they drove over to the car dealer.  
“Why didn’t you tell me that? I couldn’t have dealt with her putting a gun to her head!” Ryan raised his voice.  
“Yes you could have. You would have never agreed to it if I told you that there was the chance she’d try. I briefly mentioned it when we had that discussion too.” Horatio raised his back.  
“If this wasn’t done, Saris would still be alive and probably scheming something absolutely awful. He would have tried to kill her, Wolfe! What else could I do?” Horatio questioned.   
“At least told me!” Ryan said back. Horatio sighed.  
“Anyway, let’s just focus on the task at hand now.” Horatio grumbled as he pulled up and parked at the dealers.   
“Can I help?” One of the salesmen asked as they got out of the car.  
“Yes, we’re wondering if a young woman just purchased a car from here.” Horatio questioned.  
“Yes” he said softly.  
“I need details of the car.” Horatio said as he flashed the male his badge.   
“Yeah, erm, it was a Lamborghini Aventador LP 700-4Roadster, metallic blue.” The man replied.  
“Thank you sir” Horatio said as he turned around and they got back into the car.  
“That’s a very fast car…” Ryan commented as they sat in the car and Horatio put his head in his hands.   
“We’ll find her H.” Ryan said as he pulled the laptop onto his lap and began searching for her.   
“Okay, she’s heading for I-95” Ryan said and Horatio immediately started the engine and pulled off, putting his seatbelt on in the process.   
‘I overestimated her…’ Horatio thought to himself as he shook his head. Ryan could see his anguish and guilt.  
“Don’t worry, we’ll find her.” Ryan said softly as he pulled his phone out.  
“I’m going to try and ring her.” Ryan said and Horatio nodded. Ryan dialled for her but it went through to voicemail.   
“Do you know where her guns are?” Horatio questioned.  
“I assume Joe took it, but I have no doubt that she somehow got it back.” Ryan said.  
“Well, the ones that were in the safe are gone too, she has 4 guns on her, Mr Wolfe. That’s if she got the one from Joe back.” Horatio grumbled.   
“You shouldn’t have let her go home on her own.” Horatio added.  
“I’m sorry, but she just found out that you were dead, I think she needed space.” Ryan glared at him and Horatio exhaled. Ryan’s phone began to ring and he looked at it.   
“I think it’s Joe.” Ryan said as he looked at the screen.  
“Well, answer it then.” Horatio exhaled.  
“Hi?” Ryan asked.  
“Is that Ryan?” A voice asked.  
“Yes, is this Joe?” Ryan questioned.  
“Yes, I’m just saying that I think you should both back off from her and give her some time.” He said.  
“That’s really not a good idea, she as at least 3 guns on her…” Ryan said softly and he heard Joe take in a sharp breath.   
“Make sure she’s okay.” Joe said before he put the phone down.   
Horatio sped down the road and eventually met with I-95 and sped down there.   
“She’s stopped at the petrol station about a mile down.” Ryan said as he looked up at Horatio and Horatio nodded as he put his foot down more. They saw the petrol station in the distance and Horatio put his foot down more when they saw a light metallic blue sports car join back onto the road.   
“That’s Zoë.” Horatio said as Ryan looked over at the car.   
“Nice car…” Ryan said to himself quietly.   
“It may be nice but it has a lot of power and that is dangerous mixed with her at the moment.” Horatio grumbled.   
“I’ll try calling her again.” Ryan said softly as he pulled his phone out and dialled for her.   
“She’s not answering.” Ryan exhaled as he rubbed his face and then felt the car accelerate as Horatio put his foot down and over took the two cars in front and pulled in behind Zoë. Both of them saw Zoë glance back at them in her mirror and she then sped up a little more. Ryan dialled for her again.   
“Why are you in Horatio’s car?!” She shouted down the phone when she answered. Ryan remained silent for a few seconds.  
“Where on Earth did you get his keys from?” She shouted as she pressed her foot down on the accelerator a little, with Horatio doing the same.   
“Zoë, I need you to slow down a pull over for me, please.” Ryan said very softly.  
“Why should I?!” She argued forcefully.  
“I have to talk to you, Zoë.” Ryan said softly.   
“Not a chance, I want to be left alone, is that too much to ask?” She questioned, lowering her tone as she shook her head.   
“I just want to speak to you, I’m not going to make you or ask you to do anything.” Ryan said softly.  
“Get out of Horatio’s car.” She shouted and then hung up. They saw her speed up and Horatio mimicked her, by speeding up himself. They could see her shaking her head as she wiped her eyes as she had the roof down. They watched her reach into her handbag on the passenger seat and then let go of the wheel completely as she pulled out a baby wipe.  
“Zoë! Hands on the wheel!” Horatio shouted as he put his window down, with his heart pounding. They watched her wipe her eyes and face where her make-up had run.   
“Can’t you go faster?!” Ryan questioned.  
“No, this is as fast as this car will go. I just hope she doesn’t push that car to its limits, I have no idea how fast that car can go.” Horatio said as he looked down at the speed-o-meter and looked at the needle pointing to 150mph. They watched her tie her hair up with both hands and Horatio leant out of the window again.  
“Zoë! PUT YOUR HANDS ON THE WHEEL, NOW!” Horatio shouted at her, but she couldn’t hear with the wind making so much noise as she drove fast. Horatio ran a hand through his hair as he watched her pull a cap from the glove compartment and put it on. They watched her relax in the seat as she put her hands back on the wheel.   
‘I should have never agreed to any of this.’ Ryan thought to himself.   
‘I’ve really done it this time, I overestimated her, I overestimated what she could take and underestimated what she’d do. This is my fault, if she kills herself, that’s completely my fault, that is her blood on my hands. I shouldn’t have done it, I should have found another way.’ Horatio thought to himself as his grip tightened on the wheel.   
“She’ll be pulled over, don’t worry.” Ryan said softly.  
“Yes, but who’s to say she’ll stop for them? She’d more than likely speed up even faster and put her life in more danger.” Horatio said back to him as he exhaled.   
“Ring Eric” Horatio ordered Ryan.   
5 minutes later, Eric rang Zoë. They saw her look down at her phone and eventually answer as she clicked the ear piece in her ear.   
“Zoë?” Eric questioned softly, hearing the air disturbance.  
“What do you want, Eric?” She questioned, trying to lighten her tone.  
“I need you to slow down, Zoë.” He said softly.  
“What? Where are you?” She questioned.   
“I’m at the lab, okay?” He said softly.  
“You better not be in that car with Ryan! Where did he get Horatio’s keys from?!” She asked forcefully.  
“I’m not in the car but I need you to slow down and pull over, please.” Eric pleaded her.  
“Why should I? When are people going to stop telling me what to do?!” She raised her voice.   
“I’m not telling you, Zoë. I’m asking you, I’m begging you to slow down.” Eric said softly. He heard her exhale.  
“Ryan just wants to talk with you, that’s all he’s not going to make you do anything, he’s not going to make you come back, he’s worried about you. I’m worried about you. Please, just slow down and pull over.” Eric said softly. He heard the phone go dead as she hung up on him. Eric immediately phoned Ryan.  
“I couldn’t get through to her, she wouldn’t listen. I’m sorry, Wolfe.” Eric said as he picked up he heard Ryan exhale.  
“What are you doing with Horatio’s car anyway? She asked how you got his keys? How did you get them?” Eric questioned.  
“It’s a very long story, Eric, I’ll fill you in when she’s safe.” Ryan said softly. “Thank you for trying, at least she picked up when you phoned.” Ryan added.  
“No problem, if you need anything, give me a call.” Ryan put the phone down as they watch Zoë wipe her eyes again and accelerate more. She began to pull away from Horatio as his car wouldn’t allow him to go any faster. They watched her put her foot to the floor as the car pulled away faster and at speed. Both Horatio and Ryan were mortified, they watched the car speed off.  
“She must be doing over 200mph!” Ryan mumbled, mouth open, eyes wide.   
“You should have never done this Horatio! I should have never agreed to it! She’s going to kill herself!” Ryan shouted, angry, scared and feeling guilty.  
“Don’t you think I know that, Wolfe! I overestimated what she could take!” Horatio shouted back.  
“You overestimated that she could handle you being killed?!” Ryan shouted at him.  
“Yes, I thought she could take it!” Horatio growled at him. “I made a mistake Ryan and now I’m watching the woman I love speed down this road at over 200mph! Don’t you think I’ve learnt my lesson?!” Horatio shouted at him, mortified and feeling terrible as he tried to keep himself under control. Ryan swallowed, seeing Horatio’s torment.  
“Would you rather see her in the hands of Ron Saris though?” Horatio questioned looking over at him.  
“Well, would you?” Horatio shouted, losing it a little.  
“I know, I’m sorry H. I’m sorry but I can’t watch her do this.” Ryan shook his head, he too was terrified.  
“Neither can I Wolfe, but we are and we’ve got to resolve this situation and quickly!” Horatio said as he looked back at the road with tears in his eyes. Ryan could see that Horatio was on the edge. Horatio pulled his sunglasses out of his pocket to hide his eyes as he knew they were starting to water.   
Horatio pulled out his phone and dialled for Zoë but got no answer. Ryan’s phone began to ring and he looked over at H.  
“She’s calling me.” Ryan said as he looked at the phone.  
“Well answer it!” Horatio growled at him as he pressed the accept button.  
“Where the fuck did you get Horatio’s phone?!” Zoë shouted at him. Horatio heard her shout on the phone from where he was sitting.  
“Zoë, I need you to listen to me–” Ryan began but was cut off when she hung up as she began to cry.   
“You shouldn’t have called her… she thinks I’ve got your phone.” Ryan exhaled as he closed his eyes. Both of them ran a hand through their hair and continued to drive until 30 minutes later.  
“She’s stopped beside the road.” Ryan said looking down at the laptop.  
“How far away?” Horatio questioned.  
“About 3 miles down.” Ryan said softly as he looked at the laptop and Horatio continued to drive.   
“She may have been pulled over.” Ryan said softly.   
“Perhaps or something else could have happened…” Horatio swallowed, fearing that she’d crashed. Ryan nodded and swallowed himself.   
“We’re getting closer, she’s still not moved.” Ryan said as he looked at the laptop screen and both of them swallowed, fearing the worst.


	5. Chapter 5

They were about 3 minutes from where Zoë had stopped.  
“No, she’s moving again.” Ryan said, looking at the laptop screen. Both of them exhaled a relieved breath. They passed the spot where Zoë had stopped and saw a flat tyre at the side of the road as well as dark skid marks.  
“She doesn’t know anything about cars or changing tyres… she didn’t even know that there was a spare tyre in the back of her car.” Horatio said to himself.  
“Perhaps someone stopped and helped?” Ryan asked softly. He saw Horatio’s hands tighten on the wheel as his stress levels elevated.  
“There’s her car.” Ryan said, when he got a glimpse of her car in the distance. Horatio nodded and kept his foot down constantly.   
“You’re going to kill your engine, H.” Ryan said softly.  
“I don’t care, Mr Wolfe.” Horatio murmured.   
“She’s going slower, we’re getting closer.” Ryan said as he sat up in the seat straight.  
“Yes, I can see that Mr Wolfe.” Horatio grumbled.   
They managed to get behind her again and watched her driving, just as dangerously.   
“Ring her.” Horatio said as he slowed and watched Zoë driving as Ryan called her.  
“Zoë, don’t hang up, please.” Ryan pleaded and he heard her exhale as she looked in her mirrors at Horatio’s car.  
“I just want to say something that’s all.” Ryan said softly as he watched her drive.  
“Go on then.” She growled.   
“Horatio isn’t dead, Zoë. He wasn’t killed.” Ryan said softly and Horatio glanced over to him in shock and he shook his head at him.  
“Don’t be so fucking sick, Ryan. That’s a sick joke!” She shouted at him as she hung up and immediately sped up again.   
“Zoë! Slow down!” Horatio shouted out the window again, trying to keep his distance from her so she didn’t speed up to a speed that he couldn’t keep up with. Ryan called again and passed Horatio the phone.   
“Zoë, don’t hang up, he’s telling you the truth. I’m driving, Ryan’s in the car with me. It’s Horatio, beautiful.” Horatio said softly.   
“Just let me explain.” Horatio said softly and they slowed as she slowed in her car.  
“I’m alive, it was a part of the plan to make sure Ron Saris didn’t hurt you or get close to you. I had to do it to protect you.” Horatio said and he didn’t hear her at all, she remained silent.   
“I love you, Zoë. I’m so sorry that any of this has happened, but I had to protect you, I couldn’t stand back and watch you get hurt or even killed.” Horatio said softly.  
“Just pull over for me, please.” He questioned and she glanced back at them in the mirror.  
“Please, just pull over, Zoë.” Horatio pleaded.   
“This isn’t real, I’m going crazy.” She whispered to herself as she hung up as her eyes welled to the point of her sight being impaired. Horatio looked down at the phone as it disconnected.   
“What is she doing?!” Horatio questioned when they saw her take her seatbelt off.   
They watched her rise in the seat as both of their hearts skipped a beat, fearing that she was going to jump out of the car, she gripped the top of the windscreen. They watched her stand in the car as she kept her foot on the accelerator and let go of the wheel. She looked back to Horatio’s car and they saw the state she was in. Her hat blew off and past Horatio’s car as her hair escaped her pony tail. She raised her right hand and threw the phone out of the car with all her might. They saw the phone smash to pieces at the side of the road as she looked back round to them and then slunk back down into the seat.   
‘I can’t do this! I think I’m going to have a heart attack, I can’t watch her do this, I can’t.” Horatio thought to himself, genuinely believing that he was going to have a heart attack.   
She began to speed up again as she pulled the seatbelt over her and clicked it into place and reached over to the glove compartment and pulled something out. They sped up and watched her pull something black and hold it in her hand as she looked down to it. She put it up to her ear and they realised that it was another phone.   
“She just threw her phone out of the car.” Ryan said, seeing her ringing someone.   
“Perhaps it’s a second phone? I think she mentioned that she kept a spare phone in the BMW.” Horatio said softy and Ryan nodded.  
They could see her shaking her head and wiping her eyes as she sped down the road. They saw her whisp her hair back with her free hand as she let go of the steering wheel. She sat back as she raised her left leg and put her knee against the steering wheel to steady it as she wiped her eyes with her spare hand. Horatio could feel his heart skipping beats as he watched her sit in this highly dangerous position. He knew she wasn’t thinking clearly and wasn’t thinking about the danger. ‘Perhaps she is thinking about the danger? Perhaps she’s doing this on purpose?’ Horatio thought to himself. They both exhaled a sigh of relief when they saw her sit up and take hold of the wheel again as she continued to talk on the phone.   
10 minutes later they saw her hang up and put the phone in the passenger seat as she continued to wipe her eyes. Ryan’s phone began to ring and he answered.  
“Joe?” He questioned.  
“Ryan I think you need to lay off her, she’s very unstable and is not sure what to think. She is convinced she’s going crazy, I’ve tried to tell her that she’s not but she doesn’t believe me. It’s not doing her any good chasing her down the road.” Joe said and Ryan swallowed.  
“I’ve got to go, sorry, thank you.” Ryan said as Horatio slammed his brakes on and came to a strong halt as they watched Zoë sit back in the seat and perform a hand-brake U-turn and face them in the car. Both Ryan and Horatio sat there, with their hearts in their throats as they watched and heard Zoë rev the engine. They could see the dark skid marks on the road again. ‘Thank God it’s not a busy road…’ Ryan thought to himself. They could see that she was still crying, but she focussed on the grill of Horatio’s car.   
Horatio immediately pulled his seatbelt off and began to open the door when Zoë pulled off, charging towards them. Horatio immediately closed the door and watched her picking up speed as both of their hearts felt like they had stopped. At the last minute she turned and drove off the road and over the grass that divided the two roads. Horatio put his foot down and made and immediate turning and drove across the grass and followed her up the road, heading back to New York. Zoë rang Ryan and he picked up quickly.  
“Why are you doing this to me, I just want space.” She cried.  
“I need you to pull over, Zoë. Please.” Ryan asked her softly. They caught up with her and watched her drop her phone as her head fell forwards. Ryan quickly hung up when he saw her drop the phone.   
“No! She’s blacked out!” Horatio shouted as he accelerated and watched her car drift. He pulled up beside her and leant out of the window.  
“Zoë! Pull over.” Horatio shouted and he watched her lift her head as she lifted it and looked at the road and then round to Horatio as he leant out of the window. She froze when she saw him.   
“Zoë, It’s really me! Please pull over!” Horatio shouted and she just looked at him. ‘He’s dead, he’s not there, my mind is playing tricks on me, he’s not here.’ She thought to herself. He watched her head drop again as her body relaxed and her foot pressed down faster so Horatio sped up with her.   
“Zoë!” Horatio shouted and then watched her come around again just as she almost came off the road. She straightened the car out and shook her head as tears began to fall.   
“You’re not real! You’re not here.” Zoë shouted at him.  
“I’m real, I’m not dead. Zoë, sweetheart, please pull over” Horatio shouted and watched her speed up as she clenched her jaw and he sat back in his seat as he watched her speed away, she put her foot to the floor and watched the speed-o-meter reach its limits of 220mph. He couldn’t keep up. They watched her perform a hand-brake slide in the car as she continued to have her foot on the accelerator as she drifted sideways down the road. Both of their hearts skipped beats as they watched the car slow as the tyres produced smoke and she accelerated off the road and through a fence. Both of them ran a hand through their hair as they drove and then turned off and saw Zoë running through the field, having left her car. They could see that she had a gun in her hand as they both got out of the car. They both sprinted after her but she was too quick.   
“Zoë! It’s really me, slow down, please.” Horatio shouted, out of breath as he continued to run after her. She began to slow, but not out of choice, she was beginning to get tired and exhausted and Horatio began to close in on her as well as Ryan.  
“Ryan, back off for the moment.” Horatio shouted and Ryan slowed and halted as he watched Horatio sprint towards Zoë as she slowed. He saw Zoë stop and turn to Horatio and raise the gun to her head. Horatio carried on sprinting towards her as she took the safety off and stood there.   
Ryan watched Horatio reach her and heard a shot as the both of them fell to the ground. Ryan’s eyes widened as he watched Horatio push her to the floor, he was unsure if she’d managed to shoot herself. He began to run over to them. ‘No, she could have killed herself! She could have killed Horatio! She could have accidently shot him when he pushed her to the floor.’ Ryan thought to himself as he sprinted through the field.


	6. Chapter 6

“Stay back Wolfe!” Horatio shouted as he pulled the gun from Zoë’s grip as Ryan saw Zoë struggling under him. He released the rounds and put them in his pocket as he threw the gun over to Ryan.   
“Zoë, Zoë calm down for me beautiful, it’s really me.” Horatio pleaded. Zoë pushed him off and rose to her feet as Horatio rose to his and stepped closer to her.  
“Don’t” she shook her head and he stopped moving closer to her.  
“It’s really me, Zoë.” Horatio said softly.  
“I’ve seen ghosts before, how do I know you’re real?” She asked as her eyes watered.  
“Because I’m telling you I’m real and you can touch me, you can’t touch ghosts, Zoë.” Horatio said softly as he reached out for her. She took a deep breath and looked down at his hand.  
“I’m so sorry Zoë, I had to fake my death so I could get Ron Saris. He would have killed you otherwise. It was the only thing I could do.” Horatio said softly and she looked up at him from his hand.   
“Just touch me, I’m real, Zoë.” Horatio pleaded and she swallowed as she reached out and placed her fingertips on his palm and then looked up at him. She stepped closer and looked up at him as she removed her hand from his and raised her hand to his face and placed her hand against his cheek as she looked into his eyes. He closed his eyes as he felt her hand against his cheek and she sharply inhaled as she realised he was real.  
“I’m not crazy?” She questioned.  
“No beautiful, you’re not crazy.” Horatio said as he opened his eyes as she pulled her hand away from his cheek. He saw her face drain of colour and her legs weaken. He reached out to her but she pushed his hand away.  
“Zoë” Horatio said as he stepped closer just as her eyes rolled up and her body began to fall. He quickly pulled her in close to him and then lifted her into his arms as Ryan ran over.  
“Is she okay?” Ryan questioned.  
“She’s passed out.” Horatio said as they walked over to the car. She began to come around and she looked up at Horatio as he carried her.  
“Am I dead?” She questioned.  
“No beautiful, you’re not, you’ve just passed out that’s all.” Horatio said softly.  
“Put me down please.” She asked.  
“Sweetheart, you’re exhausted.” Horatio said softly.  
“I said put me down, please.” She asked more forcefully and Horatio delicately put her down.   
“I’ll see you at the car, Mr Wolfe.” Horatio said and Ryan quickly headed away.   
“You may not be dead, but that doesn’t mean things are going to be all fine and dandy.” She growled at him.  
“I know, I know that sweetheart, but I had to do it to protect you.” Horatio said softly.  
“Protect me? Horatio, I’ve nearly killed myself with my gun twice and brought that death-trap of a car to do it for me!” She shouted at him.  
“I know, I overestimated what you could take. But I had Mr Wolfe look out for you and I knew that if you did leave that you’d go to Joe’s and I was comfortable that he could handle you.” Horatio pleaded.  
“I’m sorry, you overestimated and thought that I could handle you dying? The only thing that’s been keeping me from killing myself ever since Maya died was you.” She said as she tensed.  
“Yes, and I’m truly very sorry, but you have to understand that I had to do it to protect you from Ron Saris, who now by the way is dead and won’t be harming you or following you.” Horatio said softly. She scowled at him.  
“I can’t believe you did that, I can’t believe you did that to me!” She raised her voice.   
“I did what had to be done, would you rather wake up in some dingy house, held captive again? He wouldn’t have stopped at anything, Zoë. I couldn’t let that happen. He would have raped and killed you, Zoë, and that is something I would never let happen. I had to do this to protect you.” Horatio said back to her. He watched her expression change to a vacant expression and her head fell forwards but before he could move in closer and lift her head she looked back up at him as she came back around.  
“Do you know what your death did to me? I was so close to killing myself Horatio, Joe had to restrain me! I would have killed myself if he wasn’t stronger than me! Not even he could talk me out of it!” She raised her voice again.   
“I know, I know sweetheart, please don’t remind me because I know what I did, I know what it did to you, I cannot tell you how sorry I am, really I can’t.” Horatio pleaded. She looked down and shook her head as tears began to fall from her eyes.  
“I thought you were really dead, I saw those pictures Ryan had got.” She gasped as she looked back up at him with tears rolling down her cheeks.   
“I’m so sorry beautiful, but it had to be believable. I couldn’t tell you, I couldn’t tell anyone apart from Ryan as he needed to keep you safe.” Horatio said as he reached out only to be pushed away.  
“Ryan knew all this time?!” She raised her voice again.  
“Yes, but only to keep you safe, he couldn’t tell you. I told him not to tell you. We went to New York when we found you there and he tried to tell you, but you left before he got the chance.” Horatio said softly as he kept his hands to himself.  
“Zoë, I really am sorry and if there is anything I can do to make you feel better I will do it, I don’t care what lengths I have to go to.” Horatio pleaded.   
“You’re an idiot.” Zoë muttered as she looked down.   
“I know, beautiful.” Horatio said as he watched her shake her head.  
“You’re an absolute idiot.” She said as she looked up and threw her arms around him. Horatio bowed his head.  
“I know I am” Horatio whispered into her ear as he began to rub her back.   
“I’m so sorry Zoë” he said as she sobbed into his neck and chest.  
She pulled back slightly and pecked at his lips as she closed her eyes. She deepened the kiss as he kissed her back and then broke as she tightly hugged him again.   
“I love you so much Horatio.” She mumbled into his chest.  
“And I love you so much too, Zoë.” Horatio said quietly into her ear. He felt her relax and pulled away, knowing she’d blacked out and placed his hand on the side of her face.   
“I’m sorry I did this to you, beautiful.” He said as she looked at his chest blankly as he brushed her temple with his thumb. She came back around and looked up at him.  
“I’m sorry.” She apologised.  
“Don’t apologise, come on, shall we go home?” Horatio questioned. She nodded at him and then turned with him.   
“If you ever do that to me again, I will kill you myself.” She said softly as she looked down at the floor.   
“I give you permission too.” Horatio said softly as he looked over to her and placed his hand on her back. He looked back to the car and watched Ryan get out of the car and looked round when he no longer felt Zoe. He looked down and she was on the floor, unconscious again. Horatio rolled her onto her back and took her pulse then lifted her up off the grass and continued to walk over to the car.  
“Shouldn’t you put her in the recovery position on the floor?” Ryan questioned.   
“No, it’s grassy, it’ll affect her hay fever.” Horatio said softly as he reached his car.   
“Open the back please.” Horatio said and Ryan opened one of the back doors and Horatio jumped into the car with Zoë in his arms. He placed her on the seat and cleared her airways. She came round and looked up at Horatio.  
“It’s okay, you’ve just passed out sweetheart.” Horatio said softly as he placed his hand on her side and pulled her hair out of her face with the other. He watched her fall into a blackout and then sat beside her as he took hold of one of her hands.   
“Is she okay?” Ryan questioned.  
“Yes, she’ll be fine, she’s just extremely stressed at the moment.” Horatio said softly and Ryan nodded at him.   
“Mr Wolfe, I’ll need you to drive us back please, I need to sit back here with her.” Horatio said softly and Ryan nodded at him.   
“Shouldn’t she be coming around?” Ryan questioned, still seeing her trapped in the daze.  
“Sometimes it lasts longer.” Horatio said softly and Ryan nodded at him.  
“What shall I do with her car?” Ryan questioned.  
“If you could please reverse it up and park it on the side of the road and then get the bag out of the back.” Horatio said softly and Ryan nodded and then closed the door.   
“Come on sweetheart.” Horatio said softly as he rubbed her side.   
“I’m so sorry.” He whispered as he picked up her hand and kissed her knuckles. He tenderly placed his hand on her neck to get her pulse again and then exhaled as he looked at her placid face.  
“Are you back with me?” Horatio questioned when he saw her blink and she looked over to him tiredly and swallowed.  
“Yeah” she said softly as she looked up at him. He gave her a smile.  
“Ryan is going to drive us back while we both get some rest.” Horatio said softly.   
“I need to get my cars back to Miami though… and I’m sorry for buying that Lamborghini…” She said looking up at him.  
“Not a problem, there’s no need to apologise, but you do realise that we’re selling it as soon as we get it home as I’m not having you drive that death-contraption.” Horatio said softly and Zoë giggled a little as she nodded her head.  
“I’ll have them picked up and toed back home.” Horatio said softly and Zoë nodded at him. She sat up and turned to him and then broke down as she raised her hands to her face. Horatio pulled her in and hugged her tightly as he began to play with her hair.   
“I’m sorry.” Horatio whispered as he kissed her temple. She moved her head and placed her lips against his and began kissing him. She placed one hand on the side of his head and the other on his shoulder as he placed one on her thigh and the other on the side of her neck. They deepened the kiss by parting lips. Their tongues met and Zoë began to push Horatio back to the seat as she leant on him. Horatio could hear Ryan approaching the car and placed his hands on Zoë’s hips.  
“Ryan’s coming back.” Horatio said as he broke from the kiss and looked up at her. She withdrew and looked out of the other window as she wiped her eyes. Horatio sat up and placed his hand on her back as she continued to wipe her eyes and Ryan jumped into the front.  
“Ready?” he questioned and she nodded as she looked the other way.  
“Yes, Mr Wolfe.” Horatio said softly and he reversed.  
“Sit back sweetheart and put a seatbelt on.” Horatio said softly as he placed his hand on her thigh. She glanced round to him and nodded as she sat back and pulled the seatbelt over her, Horatio doing the same.   
“Try and get some sleep, beautiful.” Horatio said quietly as he placed his hand on her thigh. She nodded as she leant over and placed her head on his shoulder and took hold of his hand. She fell sleep quite quickly.   
“I’m sorry you had to be involved in this, Ryan, but I do really appreciate all of your help.” Horatio said softly and Ryan looked up at him in the mirror and nodded.  
“She’s absolutely exhausted, I highly doubt that she got any sleep.” Horatio said softly.  
“She got a few hours last night but went sleepwalking twice so it was disturbed sleep.” Ryan said softly and Horatio nodded.  
“At least she isn’t going to be hurt by Ron Saris.” Horatio exhaled as he began to play with her hair.   
“Where were you when he was outside hers? He was just about to throw the grenade in through her window.” Ryan questioned.  
“I was the other side of the street, but when you pulled up you got in my way and blocked my view.” Horatio said softly and Ryan nodded.  
“Well at least one of us got him.” Ryan mumbled and Horatio nodded.   
Horatio looked over to her and took her pulse.  
“Is she okay?” Ryan questioned, seeing Horatio do this.  
“Yes, I’m only checking because she’s passed out twice.” Horatio said softly as he moved his hand and placed it against the side of her ribcage.   
“What are you doing?” He questioned, alarmed.  
“I’m checking to see if her pacemaker is still in place, it could have shifted and pulled the wires, which would make her pass out and become extremely fatigued.” Horatio said as he exhaled.  
“It’s in place, she’s just under stress.” Horatio said as he withdrew his hand and put his head back as he began to play with her hair.   
“You should try and get some rest, H.” Ryan said softly and Horatio looked down at Zoë and exhaled. He knew Ryan could see how exhausted he was, he barely got any sleep that night after driving all day the day before. They stopped off a few times but Zoë didn’t wake, not even when Horatio got out. Horatio had had a conversation with Joe whilst on the way back, explaining everything to him. Joe was thankful she was okay and that Horatio wasn’t dead, although he hated that he had put Zoë though so much, but understood why he’d done it. They finally got home and Horatio dropped Ryan off and then drove back to Zoë’s. He woke her up once they returned and helped her in as she was still half asleep. He helped her up the stairs.   
“You’re a bloody twit, do you know that?” She questioned as she looked down at the steps.   
“I do Zoë, I don’t expect you to forgive me for what I’ve done right this second, but I need you to understand why I did it.” Horatio said softly.   
“Ron Saris wouldn’t have got anywhere near me, not with you around.” Zoë said bitterly.   
“He would have Zoë, he’s a clever man, despite what you may think and the impression he gives off. What he had planned for you… I can’t bear to think about it, Zoë. I’m glad I did it as there was no way that he would have got near you if I was undercover and protecting you. But at the same time, I feel terribly guilty for causing you so much stress and hurt.” Horatio said softly as they walked into the bedroom.  
“You would have felt worse if I had actually killed myself. Joe had to physically fight me to get that gun off me. I was going to kill myself to be with you, I can’t live on this Earth without you, Horatio. You do not understand just how much you mean to me Horatio, if you did you would have never done that. When are you going to understand just how much I love you? I would take my life to be with you, Horatio. That’s how much I need you, how much I love you.” Zoë said as she stood in the middle of the room looking up at him.  
“I understand that, Zoë; if the roles were reversed, I would have done the same.” Horatio said softly. She broke down again and wrapped her arms around his waist.   
“Zoë, if there is anything I can do to show you how sorry I am, please tell me.” Horatio said softly and she pulled away.  
“Just sleep with me, please.” Zoë said as she looked up at him and he nodded.  
“Come on then, shower and bed.” Horatio said softly and she nodded as he wiped the tears from her cheeks.   
“I love you.” She said before she planted a tender kiss on his lips.   
“I love you too.” Horatio said softly as he returned the kiss and then walked into the en-suite with her.   
They both got into bed after their showers and Zoë laid as closely as possible to him. They gave each other one last kiss before falling asleep.


End file.
